Not everything that we strive for can go the way as we planned. Sometime we just have to make turns and clear obstacles before we reach our dreamed destination. This can also happened to you if you are deciding for adoption. There are cases whereby an adopted child just cannot get along with the rest of the family members and it somehow becomes the adoptive parents’ wrong move. This is what we refer to as “adoption dissolution” which could have caused by a few factors. Adoption dissolution is also commonly known as “unadoption”.

We seldom find adoption dissolution in newborn or infant adoption as they are still at a good age to adapt to the new environment. Foster children are more commonly found with this problem as they find difficulties in getting use to the new environment and the new family members, especially the siblings.

When an adopted child first joins the family, you can expect problems like hatred from brothers and sisters towards the newly adopted child or the adopted child may behave weirdly or abusively towards the rest of the family. Either way, the adoption advice is to go through counseling from the professionals. This is a way to resolve the problems but it is not always effective.

It is an unfortunate fact that some older children have gone through adoption process a few times to find the right family. However, this fact doesn’t imply that the characteristics of this group of older children are very bad as most of the time; they are “unwanted” due to medical conditions.  

Children who cannot adapt to the new family are mostly suffering from either reactive attachment disorder or ADHD. The lack in understanding and knowledge of such disorders may have caused adoptive parents to give up hopes after finding difficulties in dealing with them.

Adoption dissolution is not always a wrong choice. It is an option to allow the adoptive child another opportunity to be adopted by another family which are more prepared and well informed to take care of the child’s special needs.

There are cases whereby a child would request not to be adopted at all. In certain areas, it is legitimate for children who are 14 years or older to ask for adoption dissolution. Consequently, these children would be either send back to the foster home or stay with other relatives. Such situation is undesirable and isn’t good for the kid, but as mentioned, not all things happened the way we want it.